The Journeyman Can [PrimeTime II, promo #2]
May 11, 2020 20:14:23 GMT -5
Post by Admin on May 11, 2020 20:14:23 GMT -5
Metaphors have a way of holding the most truth in the least space.
- Orson Scott Card
The view opens up to show champion-hopeful Max Ironside seated outside at Terrasse Sur L'Auberge, a restaurant with a rooftop terrace that has views of the Old Port of Montreal. On the table are the remains of what was probably a pretty spectacular lunch. He sounds upset, almost dejected.
Max Ironside
Goddess of War. She's officially adopted that now, I heard. Somebody saw a new graphics package she had done.
Rayna
Ohhhkay. And?
Max Ironside
Gust has his Rage 25/8 Podcast. Athena's got a spiffy new nickname. What do I have that makes me stand out? I need to have a hook! I need to separate myself from the pack so I can really cement myself in Bret Hart's mind as the guy who can carry the company.
Rayna
You don't need some silly gimmick.
She reaches across the table, resting her hand over his bad one. The diamond ring on her finger catches the light, blinding him with a flash in the late-afternoon sun.
Max Ironside
No but I-
She cuts him off with a gentle shake of her head, setting her empty plate on his and pushing them aside. Taking his bad hand in both of hers, she leans forward and the look in her eyes makes it clear that he needs to listen.
Rayna
You work harder than anyone I know, Max. And while Raging Dead is bragging about how he was teamed with someone to boost their skills, while he's nursing the wounds because he wrestled last night and then had to take a red-eye flight here before he could even think about decent rest in an actual bed… you're here after I forced you to take a break from training and you're… worrying about your image?!
His reply comes out small, sheepish as he looks away and pushes his glasses back up his nose with his good hand.
Max Ironside
It's something I can control.
Rayna
Right. Okay. And I get that, I really do. But this is silly, Max. You work so hard. You've gone to so many awesome places, done some incredible things and so what if you haven't won any championships along the way? Does that really matter when you're one of the greatest journeymen that wrestling's ever seen?
Max Ironside
Journeyman?
He frowns, shaking his head at the descriptor.
Max Ironside
No. I don't like that one bit. I want to be a legend… a household name.
Rayna
What's wrong with being reliable and skilled? I'm serious. Think about it, Max. I mean really think. You have the opportunity to travel, to continue to expand your skillset. You're not chained down to a style, to a single place. You want so badly to be a star but you don't realize those are the ones who've already burned out. That's what you call the ones like that Gust guy… guys who can't really work but get booked simply because they're a name. That's the quota being filled. And if he makes it through, if the title ends up around his waist, what happens? Does anyone give the place a second glance when it's just more of the same old, same old song and dance that he's done a thousand times in his career? Nope. Boooooooring. It's not exciting. It's not new. It's-
Max Ironside
Oh my God, you're right.
She settles back in her seat with a satisfied grin that fades upon seeing a strange smile crossing the face of her beloved husband. She knows that look. She almost dreads what's coming next.
The view switches to the Bell Centre, where the AWF crew is putting together the ring. The ropes are currently being hung as Max Ironside walks slowly down the ramp, watching the progress. He's dressed casually in a pair of neon green-and-white-striped Zubaz with a Bart Simpson shirt and a neon pink fanny pack. He looks like he just walked straight out of the 90's wrestling scene. The only thing missing is a Ribera Steak House jacket and a dusting of cocaine around his nostrils.
Softly, a familiar tune starts to play over the noise of the construction. The music swells as Max hops over the barrier and runs up a few steps to lean on the red-painted railing, looking wistfully towards the ring as he starts singing softly.
Max Ironside
Who can take a three-way dance,
Sprinkle it in dew,
Cover it in awesomesauce,
and a miracle or two?
He grins, sprinting the rest of the way up the steps to the top where he turns and does the triumphant Rocky Balboa pose.
Max Ironside
The journeyman!
The journeyman can!
The journeyman can 'cause he does it all with heart
And makes the wrestling world good!
Down in the ring, the workers are whistling and dancing to the tune, almost skipping around as they tighten and adjust the ropes. The view seems to speed up and now the ring is ready for tonight's event, the spotlight shining down on the middle to illuminate the AWF logo on the canvas. Max is on the ring steps now, dressed in his full gear, complete with leather vest. He looks determined, resting his hand on the top turnbuckle lovingly as he turns to belt out the next verse.
Max Ironside
Who can take opportunity,
Wrap it in a sigh,
Finally win it all,
and make a yummy key-lime pie?
He springs over the top rope and lands just on the edge of that spotlight, looking at it longingly for a moment before he turns his back on it.
Max Ironside
The journeyman!
The journeyman can!
The journeyman can 'cause he does it all with heart
And makes the wrestling world good!
Slowly, Max climbs to stand on the second rope, one foot after the other. He lifts his arms up as though he's celebrating a huge win. Suddenly the seats look packed and the crowd noise is overwhelming as Barron Boneius is shown in the ring, vanquished and embarrassed while Snively tends to his defeated master.
Max Ironside
Who can take a tournament,
Dip it in a dream,
Separate the bad luck,
And foil the evil schemes?
A children's chorus joins in from somewhere, clearly startling Max Ironside who almost loses his balance as we shift back to the present and the still-empty arena.
Random Child #1
The journeyman!
Random Child #2
Random Child #2
The journeyman can!
ALL THE CHILDREN
Max Ironside can!
ALL THE CHILDREN
Max Ironside can!
Max Ironside
Wait… that's me!
That's right, kids!
That's right, kids!
The journeyman can!
The journeyman can 'cause he does it all with heart
And makes the other two look good!
Grinning, he back-flips off the rope and lands on his feet just as the spotlight shifts to illuminate his spectacular dismount. Walking over to the apron, he takes a bow before holding up large pieces of poster board on which the following words are written in block-printed magic marker:
THE PRECEDING MESSAGE WAS PAID FOR IN PART
BY THE HANDICAPPED HERO CHAMPIONSHIP FOUNDATION,
AND DOES NOT REPRESENT THE FEELINGS, SENTIMENTS OR...
THE PRECEDING MESSAGE WAS PAID FOR IN PART
BY THE HANDICAPPED HERO CHAMPIONSHIP FOUNDATION,
AND DOES NOT REPRESENT THE FEELINGS, SENTIMENTS OR...
He fumbles and almost drops the cards, still smiling like an idiot as the next message is revealed:
POLITICAL LEANINGS OF THE ALBERTA WRESTLING FEDERATION
OR ANYONE ELSE WHO MAY RECEIVE BLAME
FOR THIS BLATANT PLAGIARISM OF A WELL-KNOWN MOVIE SONG.
POLITICAL LEANINGS OF THE ALBERTA WRESTLING FEDERATION
OR ANYONE ELSE WHO MAY RECEIVE BLAME
FOR THIS BLATANT PLAGIARISM OF A WELL-KNOWN MOVIE SONG.
Star-wipe out on Max's shit-eating grin and fade to chartreuse like usual.
