chapter sixteen

September 28, 2012 (off camera)

It was six in the morning in Cincinnati, Ohio when Brad Jackson staggered through the lobby of the Millennium Hotel. He didn't realize he was being watched as he went through the check-in process until his eyes locked on the dark haired girl sitting next to a potted palm. The look on his face was priceless as recognition crashed over him in waves. "Kasey?"

She chuckled as she stood up, sliding the hands into her hoodie's pockets. "Yup, it's me. At least I was still me the last time I looked... I mean I'm not Santa Claus or anything." A grin blossomed on her features as she took a few steps towards him as though awaiting backlash.

A few emotions flickered across Jackson's features: surprise, shock, annoyance, and finally smug satisfaction. He held out his arms, letting his duffel bag slide off his shoulder to the floor as he turned towards her. "C'mere, kid..."

A soft laugh came from her as she pulled her hands out of her pockets and sprang into his arms, hugging him tight. "Bet you're wondering why I'm here?"

"Honestly, no. I think I could probably guess." He took a step back, looking down at her. "Tell me it's not what I think it is?"

"Uhm, well… I don't know what you think it is so…" she was still clinging to him, finally feeling her anxiety fade as she pressed against him. There was nothing romantic in it— she'd always seen Jackson as more of a father figure since she'd first met him when she was ten years old.

"A pep talk?" He frowned, "honestly, Kase… you don't need that. You just need to get in that ring and school that Leavenworth cunt like you know you can. The whole family is worthless—"

"Hey!" She protested, shaking her head, "Ignis is awesome. It's just…"

"Kase," his tone was firm as he pushed her off him, "as much as I dig the hugs, people are staring."

"Oh." She suddenly felt really stupid. If people saw her groping Jackson in a public place, they'd probably start spreading rumors that she was cheating on Kyle. He saw the crestfallen look on her face, recognizing it for what it was.

"You want me to take out that piece of shit that broke your heart?"

The sigh was soft, barely audible as she looked slowly up at him. "Y'know, I sorta figured that's what you were gonna say… or do… if you had the chance." The faintest smile came to her lips, sadness in her eyes as she took in a deep breath. "But no. I think… it might be okay. We talked a lot last night."

"Cool story," he snapped, rolling his eyes.

"Play nice," she chided. "And don't tell me you can't because we both know that's a giant lie. You're always really nice to me. Then again, I shouldn't say that… it'll just feed that beastly ego of yours."

He chuckled, "my ego obscures reality, but that's nothing new around here," the smile was self-deprecating, at best. "Challenging for a World Title shot tonight. Y'know how I love being top dog."

"Jax, you love being on top of anything." That grin was smug as she said that, her fingers wrapping around his wrist as she tugged on it. "C'mon… come have a drink with me in the lounge before you go up to your room?"

He let her pull him along, pausing only to heft his duffel back onto his shoulder. "Kasey—"

"Stuff it," she said over her shoulder, "I'm old enough to drink now so it's okay." She led him to an empty table and then almost shoved him into a chair. "Alright, buster… give me a REAL smile. I'll go get us something to drink!" Patting his cheek lightly, she moved away from him and headed towards the bar, the jingle of the straps on her bondage pants the only sound in the deserted lounge.

It was barely light out and he hadn't slept worth a shit in days but here he was in a bar with this crazy little kid. Before he could even fish out his cell phone to check his messages, she was back with two giant glasses that looked like they contained orange juice. He quirked one dark brow and looked from her to the glasses as she set them down.

"He said they're called Mimosas and Marilyn Monroe used to drink them all the time."

"Ah," he reached into his duffel bag and pulled out a bag of Jack Links beef jerky, setting it on the table. "Breakfast of champions, then."

Kasey tore into the salty dried meat with absolute delight. "YES! This is the stuff." Flopping back into her chair, she immediately kicked off her shoes and tucked her feet up under her. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

He froze in the motion of bringing the glass to his lips, eschewing the straw. "What?"

"For loving Kyle." She elaborated, "do you think I'm stupid?"

Frowning, he took a long swallow of the orange juice and cheap sparkling wine, feeling it souring his guts already. "Should I?"

"Be honest… that's why I'm here, Jax. I just… I don't know if I'm doing the right thing anymore. Christian said he would pay for me to move to Fort Lauderdale. He even had a place picked out for me and it was perfect. It was within walking distance to the school so I could train really easy. And I… I walked away from that and went back to Chicago to stay in the apartment Kyle and I got together even though he's pretty much moved out."

He shook his head. "This is why I've only dated people in the business, Kase. Yeah, maybe Kyle's on the fringe here as the Director of Talent Relations, but he doesn't have the pressure on his shoulders. He doesn't have to maintain muscle tone. He doesn't have to train until he wants to pass out. Sure, he has to travel with us, but he gets to spend his time on the phone when we're running through the moves we know until we can do them in our sleep. You're a champion, and if he doesn't get that you need to balance that with your relationship with him…" he shrugged, "fuck 'im and move on. Right now, you're in a precarious position. You wonder why I've had so much trouble keeping a steady relationship? This is why. The shit with Ryann fell apart because she wanted me to stay at home while she did her music shit. She didn't get that I was in the middle of a title push. She didn't care because it was all about her and what she wanted. Maybe that's where you are with Kyle— goin' in two opposite directions with your careers."

Jackson pulled out a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos from his bag and tossed them on the table, watching her eye them closely. "You ok, kiddo? I mean... honestly?"

Looking up from her salty treats, for a moment it was like a deer in the headlights. Letting out another soft sigh, she shrugged her shoulders, "if I said I was you'd know I was lying." Unabashedly answering the question, she grabbed the Doritos and tore open the bag. "I don't know... I go day by day; at least it makes me saner that way... sometimes. I mean it still hurts… what he did. It hurts a lot but I'm trying not to think about that because of the title. It's really hard to balance this. I don't know how you do it."

Jackson nodded, saying nothing in response, instead reaching into his back pocket and withdrawing his pack of smokes. He lit one with that stage magician flourish before exhaling, ignoring the NO SMOKING sign on the wall above their table. "Yeah," he said softly, not really knowing the right words to make it all better for her. "See, here's the thing: when I walk through those doors, I'm not a married man. I'm not a father-to-be. I'm not Lyv's husband or somebody's friend or brother. I'm a warrior. I'm a soldier, Kase. I'm getting paid to go out there and do this and I shut off all the rest of that shit. I'm the Mechanical Animal. As soon as my music hits, I'm just there in that moment. I'm not thinking about the drive to the arena. Not thinking about my shaking hands. I'm just on. Do you understand?"

She stared at him, shaking her head. "Yeah, I think I do. For the first time, I really think I do but finding that line... I hurt Kyle bad. He thought I was abandoning him and I was just trying to find me… the Summer me. You know what I mean."

"You want me to talk to him?"

"NO!" She almost yelled it, immediately lowering her voice, "I mean... you've done a lot for me already, if you haven't realized that then I really need to kick you upside the head." Leaning forward, she offered up a piece of jerky to him as a sort of consolation. "Besides," sighing lightly, "if it hadn't happened, I wouldn't be here right now, and we'd be forever not sending each other Christmas cards."

"I don't get enough Christmas cards," he replied past the mouthful of chewy beef, "guess I can't trade that then."

"So there you go." Shrugging, she looked at him and then picked up her drink, draining away half of it in one long pull at the straw. "Is Lyv okay? I saw the stuff you posted about her being in the hospital."

A shadow crossed his features as he looked away. "Yeah, was just a scare. She had a panic attack and she had some pain in her abdomen with it… thought she was losing the baby."

"Oh my god," her hand went to her mouth, "I'm so sorry." She stared at him with her big brown eyes, "tell me something good. I kinda need to hear something happy."

"Something good?" It was more than just a request; it was almost a desperate plea. He looked into her eyes, at that pure innocence that glistened there with the impish twinkle. "I kinda like having you here, Kase. You're a lot more like my kid than you-know-who ever was," he said the words with utmost sincerity. "You wanna stick around and watch me wrestle tonight?"

Her cheeks flushed with color, but she shook her head. "I can't. I've got an autograph thing this afternoon. My flight's in an hour so…" she shrugged, "otherwise I would. Just there's that whole obligation that goes with being a champion, y'know?"

"Yeah," he replied, "I know. Lose the belt and you lose that hassle though. So there's something to consider."

"What?" She frowned, "I could never tank the match, even if it meant…" she trailed off.

"Even if it meant that Kyle would take you back with open arms?"

"Nuh-uh," she replied emphatically, "not even then. I like being champion, Jax… and not just because of the belt or my ego or whatever… this has always been my dream. I finally feel like I've made it, you know?"

"Yeah."

She blinked, sitting up and leaning across the table towards him. Her fingers touched under his eye lightly, feeling the very slight swelling and the warmth there, and then running her hand up to where the butterfly strips were, against his hairline. "How'd you get those?"

"How'd I get what?" Her fingers grazed the scabbed over scrapes and he almost winced. Almost but not quite.

"You have a scratch and an almost black eye."

"Hazard of the job. Took a tumble over the top rope in Denver. Hit the barrier with my face and when the fog cleared, the other asshole in the match tapped out. Fuckin' three way— I lost the match and my spot in the tourney."

Her nose wrinkled, shaking her head lightly. "That sucks." Leaning over, she placed a chaste kiss on his cheek before standing. "I'm going to go and get out of your hair. Thanks for the talk, Jax."

He nodded, moving to his feet as well as she crossed towards the door, taking the beef jerky bag with her. "Call me," he said with a smile.

"Oh, I'm sure I'll figure out a few good things to call you," she quipped with a giggle, sounding a lot more like herself. Grinning over her shoulder, she waved to him before disappearing in the lobby. He dropped his half-smoked cigarette into the remains of her drink and then finished his own, wondering what in the hell that had been about.