chapter seventeen

November 6, 2012 (off camera)

Nobody had really noticed that Summer was in Saint Paul to watch Future Shock's Fight Night— nobody would have really expected it when she was supposed to be wrestling at Breaking Point on the weekend. She'd bought last-minute seats, and hadn't been anywhere near the action but it had still been awesome to be part of the crowd. She was still feeling that buzz when she'd spotted a familiar face in the crowd exiting the venue afterwards.

Just the sight of him had made her palms sweaty and her heart race— Christian Kincaid. Feeling like a stalker, she'd followed him back to his hotel. She had a desperate need for company and she really wanted to talk to him. It hadn't taken much to charm the guy at the front desk, and a few minutes later she was on his floor, standing outside the door to his hotel room.

Licking her lips, she tucked her shorter hair behind her ears and lifted her fist to knock. The sound of some scrambling was heard before silence would follow and the door would open, revealing the man she had come to see. Christian Kincaid, clad in a pair of boxers with a towel around his shoulders, smiled as he saw Summer. Taking a step back, he invited her in. "Kasey! Come on in, I didn't even know you came to town."

"Yeah," she laughed self-consciously, "it was kinda last minute. I just needed to get out and do something so..." she shrugged, "here I am. I saw you leaving the show and I thought maybe I'd stop by and say hi and stuff." Looking around the room as she entered, she was relieved to see he was alone. "Thank god I'm not interrupting anything. I didn't even think of that— I know you're a popular guy and..." she bit her lip, realizing she was rambling like she did when she was nervous.

"Kelly is visiting with her sister, it's all good. Come on in, have a seat." He added before closing the door back behind her. Water beaded and ran down his face as he had apparently gotten out of the shower only moments before as he rubbed the towel against his head. "There's stuff in the refrigerator if you are thirsty. Sorry for not being dressed, I wasn't expecting company."

"Oh, that's okay," she said brightly, trying to pretend like she wasn't ogling him even though her cheeks flushed red. "I'm not thirsty or anything... I'm just bored and conflicted and stuff."

"Well that's not good." He responded as he tossed the towel to land on the kitchen counter before heading towards the refrigerator himself and pulling out a Gatorade bottle before closing it back. "What's got you conflicted? Oh, I like the new hair. Even cuter than you were before though I am a sucker for brunettes."

She reached up and touched the locks that were now back to her natural color, "I kinda did it on an impulse. I was jogging by the salon and I just decided to go in and do something different. I'm sick of people making stupid assumptions and stuff so..." she let her hand fall, blushing more as she looked away from him, "I'm just glad you like it." She went over and plopped down on the bed, not really thinking of the faux pas there. "Conflicted is mostly 'cause I hung out with Andy some and... I really like him."

"We are talking about Mel's boyfriend, Andy, right?" After she nodded, he did the same and headed into his closet, dragging out his suitcase as he opened it to look for something. "He is a really nice guy; I've met him a couple times. Even chatted with him on Skype once or twice. It's alright to admit you like someone, it happens. We can't control our feelings." He said as a t-shirt was tossed out of the briefcase and landed on the pillows at the top of the bed.

"That's why I'm conflicted," she looked down at the carpet, "he's got Mel and I'm supposed to be with Kyle but he's... I don't know what's going on there. I love him with all my heart but things are just awkward now. I don't think he trusts me at all anymore."

"Well I can't read Kyle too well; he gives me a strange impression. He kinda reminds me of me when I was his age, a few years back." Not that he was that much older than Kyle, only about five years in actuality. "I heard that you went to New York to help Andy with the disaster relief effort, he's a good guy. Got a strange fascination with underpants, but it could be worse."

She nodded, "I did, and it was a really weird day. So horrible sad to see all those people who were totally demolished by the storm and by the end of it I had donated my whole savings account to the fund to rebuild Staten Island because it's just... pretty much gone. And Andy was so happy to just give them a kind word while he was handing out food and water. He's just... so nothing like Kyle in the least and I'm worried that's the only reason I like him so much. I just don't wanna become this whore like Lightning said I was— because I'm not, you know? What happened with us wasn't just some random pick up or whatever. It was..." she paused for a second, looking up at him shyly before letting her gaze dart away again, "special."

"You have to remember Lightning is a troll. She's going to say whatever she has to in order to get under your skin. Whether it's true or not. Doesn't matter what you say or do. You could be a virgin, and if she thought talking about your sex life would piss you off, she'd have you sleeping with the Vikings defense." He shrugged his shoulders before tossing a pair of shorts out of the suitcase that landed almost on top of the shirt before he closed it and put it back. "And it was special."

Her head snapped up and she stared at him, completely floored. "It was special to you?" Her voice dropped to a near-whisper as her eyes went wide, "for real?"

Christian nodded with a peculiar look on his face. "Yes. What? Did you think you were just another notch on the bedpost or something? If you did, then... you don't know me as well inside as you do out." He added with a surprised look before making his way over and leaning against the bedpost.

"I don't know what to think about anybody anymore," she sounded almost sad as she looked up at him, "you have all these beautiful and talented girls around you... Kelly and Emma and... I don't know. They all love you and I don't know how I could ever compete with that. You've got your pick of anyone you want and you're so nice... you're just so perfect. Why can't I be with someone like you?"

"I'm far from perfect. I'm probably the worst boyfriend anyone could ever choose for themselves." He stood silent for a moment, lost in thought before he looked back to her to continue. "Do you think I'm like this because I'm just some sex fiend? Let me tell you something about why I am this way, Kase. Since the day I was about sixteen, I have had countless women come through my life. And almost all of them told me they love me or they wanted to be with me forever. And here I am today, and none of them are here. None of them. I admit I have others who tell me that now, but when it's all you have heard, it's....hard to believe after a while no matter how bad you want to believe it." Once more, silence overcame him for a moment. "And for the longest time, I have become this way and gotten like this because...I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop and someone to change their mind about me. It always happens. And....if I have someone else, then maybe... I won't be as lonely as I would have been otherwise." He trailed off after saying that, looking down to his hands.

Her heart broke at his words, her brown eyes sad as they stared up at him. "I wouldn't ever leave," the words came out of her mouth before she had time to think about them, and then she felt foolish for saying something like that.

A smile came over his face as he looked down to her. "Don't take this wrong, because I know how open and honest you are. But I've heard that before. I don't want to be alone; the idea of it terrifies me. They have all told me that, and after all this time, I...I guess I'm waiting on someone to convince me once and for all." He crossed over and knelt in front of her, grabbing her hands. "But no matter what, I do love you and I will always look after you and take care of you if you need me. Because from the day I met you, that smile..." He said as a tiny one formed on her face before he started nodding. "It's absolutely one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't like seeing it as often as possible."

She felt light-headed because she could barely breathe while looking into his eyes while he held her hands like that. "Christian," she whispered his name, "if I had you all to myself, I swear I would never, ever leave... I would never do that to anybody, especially not someone like you."

"I know," he said under his breath before standing back up and pressing a kiss to her forehead. As he was about to continue, he heard a buzzing noise. He glanced around to realize it was her phone. "I think you got a text message." Christian took a seat beside her, looking over her shoulder as she got the phone out and realized it was from Andy. "Look who it is..."

She laughed at the weirdness, pressing the unlock button on her phone so that the message would load up. She didn't try to hide the screen from Christian's view— she had nothing to hide from him. It read: 'cant sleep. u awake? can i call? or just see how many messages unlimited really is b4 u wake up?'

Christian was about to speak when the phone buzzed again as another message came from him. It read: 'must be asleep. thats ok. im going to try again.'

Before she could reply, another one came up. It read: 'see, again. oh wait.. did i tell you i stubbed my toe today? i think i made up new curse words. is lurlack a curse word?' She was giggling at the last message, but hesitated before writing anything back, looking up at Christian. "He makes me laugh so much." Kincaid nodded with a little smile on his face before another set came up.

'must be asleep then. thats ok. ill tell u every detail of my day, like a live blog or something. umm..'

'i woke up about 10am, had to pee. took care of that. then i was hungry. fixed that. then there was a commercial about tampons on TV.'

'changed the channel. ive never wanted to feel like a spring rain. then my leg itched. took care of that. fascinating huh?'

'just wait till i get to the 2pm hour. thats where i thought i had sensitive nipples. but then realized my cup was dripping.'

"Oh my God," she was laughing so hard she fell against Christian before typing a response back that read, 'sorry I'm in StPaul and was just getting ready for bed. ur so funny! ' Looking up at Christian, she was grinning, "he's so hilarious! Mel is so dumb for not appreciating how awesome he is... seriously."

Christian just shrugged his shoulders. "You better call him sometime, or that phone is going to be vibrating all night." Another message came back.

'wanna hear a poem i made up? roses are red, violets are blue, this is a poem and my rhyming skills are lurlack'

She nodded, "yeah, I guess I probably should, huh?" It didn't even dawn on her that even she was doing what he expected the women in his life to do— she'd gone from saying she'd never leave to being distracted by someone else.

Two more messages followed from there: 'i wet vacced the carpet today' and 'that was totally non sexual, btw'.

Shaking her head, she closed out of the message window and looked up from the phone's screen. "I guess maybe I should go and call him so he doesn't blow up Verizon's network or something."

"You do that. And you can feel free not to tell me the sensitive nipple story later if you want." He nudged her with a smile. He followed her as she rose from the bed and headed towards the door, watching as she began to call Andy back as she walked up the hallway.

Christian just shook his head as he closed the door. "Story of my life."